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Javvad Malik

Javvad Malik

Security | Life | Cynicism

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Journey of Team Cynic–The Cynics Cut

The extended version of journey on the White hat Rally to raise money for Childline from England across France, Switzerland and Italy.  

j4vv4d Video Leave a comment July 19, 2011 1 Minute

Who the f*&^ are you?

After I explained to someone that I worked in Information Security, they commented, “well there’s not much you guys do given all the hacking that’s gone on lately.” Deep breath. Control pulse. Be calm. I could have just explained how a lot of the so-called hacking attacks were actually DDOS. Or the fact that human … Continue reading Who the f*&^ are you? →

j4vv4d Security 2 Comments July 13, 2011 3 Minutes

Don’t lose customers after a breach

So your company has just suffered a data breach. You’ve done what you can, offered the public apology, sacrificed your CISO and promised everything will be alright. But there’s a problem. Your competitors are taking advantage of your weakened state and swooping in on your customers, wooing them with offers too good to resist and … Continue reading Don’t lose customers after a breach →

j4vv4d Uncategorized 1 Comment July 11, 2011 2 Minutes

Deciphering Marketing Material

I always used to think I was perhaps not clever enough to fully grasp the marketing emails that cutting edge security companies send me… until I realised they were encrypted using an ancient cipher. I have now managed to decrypt and fully understand what they are saying: Dear Cynic, We have an exciting new breakthrough … Continue reading Deciphering Marketing Material →

j4vv4d Security Leave a comment July 7, 2011 1 Minute

How Not To Get Hired

There are many sources of information you can turn to which will seek to educate you in how to go about getting hired…. but none will tell you how NOT to get hired. Well your prayers have been answered.

j4vv4d Security, Video 1 Comment July 5, 2011 1 Minute

Cynical Security Cliches

Are you a security professional looking at the waters of information security that have been muddied to the extent that you believe it was always a stinking mudhole instead of a freshwater spring? Chances are – you’re on the way to becoming a security cynic. A maverick, renegade loose canon. Who will do whatever is … Continue reading Cynical Security Cliches →

j4vv4d Security Leave a comment June 10, 2011 3 Minutes

The Case for Security Conferences

Do you struggle to get out to security conferences? You know those places where you can network with some awesome infosec professionals and pick up a thing or two? In most cases it’s because your boss just doesn’t see the benefit of a conference and would much rather spend the training budget on sending you … Continue reading The Case for Security Conferences →

j4vv4d Security, Video Leave a comment May 22, 2011 1 Minute

Is the Cynic-Signal broken?

So I’ve been getting a few emails and tweets lately. It seems there has been much speculation around my whereabouts and lack of online activity. Some have said that I’ve returned to my home planet. Others have said that I have lost out to my arch nemesis the Sarcastic one, All these rumours aside, all … Continue reading Is the Cynic-Signal broken? →

j4vv4d Security, Video 1 Comment May 17, 2011 2 Minutes

Bin Laden killed (again)

Apparently Osama Bin Laden has been killed by U.S. Forces in Abattobad, Pakistan. There is little evidence for this, as the body was subsequently buried at sea. Of course, we can’t call President Obama a liar as he says he watched the operation unfold live via satellite. But to be honest, they could have shown … Continue reading Bin Laden killed (again) →

j4vv4d Security Leave a comment May 3, 2011 1 Minute

The Cynic Chronicles #2

Our cynical hero learns the benefit of having fine tuned alerts.

j4vv4d Comic, Security Leave a comment April 26, 2011 1 Minute

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